I think this has been one of the most difficult weeks I've had. Remember that 2 day test I took last week? Well, I was on call the night I finished it. Fortunately it wasn't a terribly busy night, but still, I was at work and I can never sleep well at work. I thought I was going to get to go home the next morning, but instead I ended up assisting my attending in the OR until 5pm the next day! I was so tired I was near tears. Mr. Big and I went out to dinner that night then I fell asleep on his couch (something I do quite regularly these days). I went home and went to bed at 10pm (wow!) and woke up at 7am dead tired. I drove to work feeling so dejected, depressed, and that I just could not physically do this anymore. I always thought I could do anything no matter what. Well, I learned my limits this week. I should not have tried to fit so many important things into one week. I got to sleep in this morning, but I am still dead tired. I looked in the mirror this morning and my appearance scared me. As luck would have it, I'm on call tomorrow for 24 hours, then I'll have to stay at work through 1pm on Monday, which will put me close to a 30 hour shift. I'm really starting to question if I can do 3 1/2 more years of this.

I crammed almost all my Christmas shopping today online. I really hope everything gets to me on time. How on earth did December get here so fast?