Annoyed at Mom part 2

I love my mom. She drives me crazy. I love my mom. I wish she would leave me alone. I love my mom. I can't stand being alone with her. I love my mom.

My mom is a challenge. I know I am a disappointent to her. She can be so mean, and the thing about it is, she doesn't see anything wrong with it. She's critical of everything I do and if I call her on it, she pulls the "poor me" thing and tries to make me feel guilty. A few months ago she told me she wishes my personality were more like hers. Ouch. I'm glad I'm not loud and histrionic. My friends are too ( I think).

I've been avoiding her like the plague lately. I haven't been all that happy and I know talking to her will make me feel worse. Case in point, a few days after my boyfriend and I broke up, she called me and left me a lengthy message on my voice mail stating that I should try and reconcile with him because "he has a lot to offer me". Wow. That really hurt my feelings. A few days later when I tried to talk to her about it, she flew off the handle saying she just can't say anything right to me anymore. Well, I guess not if she's going to go telling her broken hearted daughter to risk rejection and go grovel, as if the break up was my fault. I then get sadly told, "well, I was just hoping you would one day marry", as if I am a spinster beyond my years. Personally, I thought I had a lot to offer him as well, but did she say that? No.

We didn't talk for a week and then she acted like nothing was wrong. Because to her, nothing ever is wrong. She's perfect and we are all her ungrateful children.

Right now we have this annoying little feud over the cause of bladder infections. She doesn't believe me when I say they are from bacterial contamination of the urethra, usually fecal contamination. Tonight she called me and tried to pull an "I told you so" about it. She had visited her urologist and told him her theory of why she keeps getting the infections. It's because she works all day at a computer and she doesn't go to the bathroom enough. He agreed with her, and she couldn't wait to tell me. So I said, well that's true, but bacteria doesn't just spontaneously develop in the bladder without a source. It still comes from the urethra but if you don't urinate enough, it ascends into the bladder and multiplies, making it easier to develop an infection. She STILL didn't believe me, so I asked her why she even asks my advice if she's not going to believe me? We got into an arguement about it and she told me she was never going to bring up the subject with me again. Oh damn, that breaks my heart! This must be my karma. My last 2 boyfriends are doctors and they used to get annoyed when I would argue medical stuff with them. I totally get it now. I don't mind people asking me medical questions, but if you're going to argue with the answer, then don't ask!

Here's the deal. All this stuff seems like no big deal, but I'm already at my 99% patience level with her, so all it takes is a little nudge from her to piss me off. She even laughed one time and told me she likes to say irritating things to me because it's funny to her to get a rise out of me. Is that not the bitchiest thing? I told her that she may think it's funny, but that's the reason why I don't like to spend time with her.

I'm sorry I'm so cranky lately. I'll try to do better.